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to Self Care

Below are invitations to self-care from each chapter of It Takes a Woman to Empower Women.


Lalah Delia, a trauma-informed wellness educator, asserts that “self-care is how you take your power back.” Self-care begins with self-forgiveness and self-love, and is accomplished by remembering the neglected, lovable child within us. Self-care is an attitude: a mindset that allows us to put our own health and happiness first. 

This doesn’t mean you don’t care about your kids or your partner; it means you come first. Adopting this attitude means that once your needs are met, you can be who you need to be for others—healthy, whole, and ready to happily help those you love. 

You may not be used to treating yourself well—let’s face it, most women who have been abused haven’t learned the art of self-care and don’t know where to begin. Start off easily, small if it feels right or large if that’s better.


Below are a few suggestions taken from It Takes A Woman to Empower Women on how to practice these small (or big!) acts of self-care. These are things that require little or no money and will give you pleasure. You can find the full list of self-care ideas in It Takes A Woman to Empower Women.

"It is to our own detriment that we underestimate the might of small and simple things.

― Richelle E. Goodrich

Invitations to Self-Care

from It Takes a Woman to Empower Women

Physical Wellbeing

  • Prioritize your sleep, making sure you get the amount and quality you need. 

  • Take a walk by yourself. Walking is free and one of the best exercises for mental and physical health.

  • If you are feeling stuck, get up and move.

Regulating Your Nervous System

  • Relax with breathing. Inhale slowly to the count of five, hold to the count of two, and exhale slowly to the count of seven. Repeat three times.

  • Take a long bath. 

  • Sit in the sun, and wear sunblock.

Self Kindness

  • Look in the mirror and say “Hello, wonderful!”. You are beautiful just as you are.

  • Remember you did something well today.

  • Cook your favorite food. (Not the kids’ favorite—yours!) Enjoy it privately. 

Emotional & Mental Wellbeing

  • Decide you need to be number one! Say “no” for you twice this week. Make it three times next week.

  • Trust your boundaries. Help others when you can, but don’t feel guilty when you can’t. Say “no” just for practice!

  • Forget the words “supposed to.” That’s society telling you what to do. 

Creating Community

  • Find one person who truly supports you.

  • Share your story. You are important.

  • Surround yourself with people who feed your soul. 

Creating a Nourishing Enviroment

  • Turn the clock in your bedroom away from you.

  • Play quiet music, play loud music.

  • Make your bed every morning. It will be waiting for you later.

You can find additional journaling prompts in It Takes a Woman to Empower Women:

Self-Care Resources

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